EMPTY PEWS: What Do We Do About Absentees?

[John Dobbs]

Perhaps now more than ever our pews are empty in places we expect them to be full. 

There are many factors at work here. There is a general malaise about churches in general that has become the standard attitude in our culture. Also as Baby Boomers age into retirement they are still in relatively good health. If they have planned well they have opportunity and ability now to travel. There are those who we can only expect to see once or twice a month. There are the sick, and the 'providentially hindered' as well. At our church we have from 50-90 people gone each Sunday. In a church our size, that hurts! It affects morale and of course the offering as well. 

So, what do you do about absentees? I'll be the first to say that I've tried lots of things - and I do not have grand results to report. The list I am about to offer combines things we currently do and a few things I wish we did. 

*Keep a record each week of who was there and who wasn't. That's not the easiest thing to do. We bumped the attendance card into prominence by using Nelson Searcy's connection card ideas. In fact, ours look exactly like his! Very few members neglect to fill out the card, and most visitors do as well. It has a prominent place at the end of my sermon where everyone has time to fill it out and is encouraged to do so. The offering follows, so they can place the card in the offering tray. 

*Publish a list of absentees. Do not have your inactive members on this list - these are the folks that there is a reasonable expectation to be present. So if we have 125 present, and 75 on our absentee list - it is reasonable that if all the 'regulars' are there, we could have had 200. Each Tuesday morning our elders and staff are presented with the list of absentees for that week.

*Write absentees. Email is OK, but if you're like me there are a few hundred emails piled up in your inbox and adding more almost becomes annoying. And who writes personal notes any more? You should. It takes a chunk of a morning but I try to write most, if not all, of our absentees personally. People get lots of junk mail and bills, but few handwritten notes. I usually write on the back of a postcard that is branded with this month's theme (get those from VistaPrint) so that there's a connection between the "I missed you" and the "see what you missed"! 

*Shepherds Call Absentees. This is one of those things we're working on, but it seems to me that a Shepherd needs to know where his sheep were when we gathered to feed. Now I'd rather write a hundred cards than make one phone call, so I do feel the pain of any elder / leader who doesn't like to talk on the phone. But I think it's an essential step. It gives the absentee a recognition, and it also opens the door to discuss anything else on that person's mind. In a previous day and time I would say elders should drop by and visit absentees. Perhaps some would like this (shut ins, elderly come to mind) ... but most people would not appreciate this. But...

*Shepherds Visit Absentees. There comes a time when someone has been absent several times in a row for no apparent reason, a Shepherd should step in. Often by the time we notice someone has been missing for a while, it's too late to do much about it. That's why keeping up each week is essential. This is not usually an easy task, but done in love with the soul of the absentee in mind, it is needful. How many weeks of missing services for no apparent reason should spur an elder into action? I'd like to hear your thoughts on that.

*Love Absentees. Those who absent themselves from the assembly are to be loved and cared for. One never knows what kinds of spiritual struggles are going on .... what issues are really there. This is the wrong time for the 'get tough' speech. It's time for healing and restoration. The notes, calls, and visits are not to beat them up - they are to express love and a familial appreciation. They are not to be the subject of smarmy remarks from the pulpit or to other members.

*Let Them Go. At some point, absentees transition into inactive members. After so long it feels silly to keep saying "we miss you" when they haven't been present for months. I know some churches take this time to withdraw from them, but I have never believed that to be proper. They've already withdrawn from you. Whether they attend somewhere else or not at all, leave the door open for a return later by being kind and loving now. While you are letting them go, you are also at the same time turning you attention to those who are currently active who might need some immediate attention. 

Now I'd like you to add to that list or offer up your thoughts on the list. What are your thoughts about the empty pews? This article has not addressed the 'why' of absenteeism. Perhaps that would be a good subject for another article!

John Dobbs

[Allen Coker]

I whole-heartedly agree John. My experience is that the hardest decision is when to "let them go". If we (and the shepherds) make the contacts as you have described, that decision should be more apparent. That has happened for us in the past couple of years. Once we know that someone does not plan to be active again, we are able to focus on those that are.

Could you describe (in an email to me if you wish) how you transition to the connection card time at the end of the sermon?

[John Dobbs]

Allen, when I get to then of my lesson I ask everyone to get out their Connection Cards. (We have already mentioned them in the welcome time). On the back of the connection cards are three "next steps". I usually say, "let's take a minute to think about the message this morning and how we can put it into practice in our lives." Then we go over the next steps with a little elaboration. I ask everyone to put those in the offering plate, "but if you want to respond right now in front of this family of believers, we will be happy to pray with you right now." Then we sing a few verses of an invitation song. It is not in our church culture, at present, to respond openly. However, every week there are a dozen or more 'responses' on the next steps area of the cards. Hope that helps.

Allen Coker said:

...Could you describe (in an email to me if you wish) how you transition to the connection card time at the end of the sermon?

[Allen Coker]

This could really work for us too. I've almost quit offering much of an invitation because no one responds publicly. Just for clarification...are "the next steps" three actual points that tie into your message or are they just three blanks on the back of the card?

John Dobbs said:

Allen, when I get to then of my lesson I ask everyone to get out their Connection Cards. (We have already mentioned them in the welcome time). On the back of the connection cards are three "next steps". I usually say, "let's take a minute to think about the message this morning and how we can put it into practice in our lives." Then we go over the next steps with a little elaboration. I ask everyone to put those in the offering plate, "but if you want to respond right now in front of this family of believers, we will be happy to pray with you right now." Then we sing a few verses of an invitation song. It is not in our church culture, at present, to respond openly. However, every week there are a dozen or more 'responses' on the next steps area of the cards. Hope that helps.

Allen Coker said:

...Could you describe (in an email to me if you wish) how you transition to the connection card time at the end of the sermon?

[John Dobbs]

Neither. They are usually some kind of "to do" steps. Did you look at Nelson's example card linked above? Here's the link again:
http://www.churchleaderinsights.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/09...

There are usually three "next steps". Almost always one of them is something like "I would like to study with someone about how to become a Christian." We will change the wording of that from time to time, but that's the gist of it. Another one might be a practical application of the lesson such as "I will pray this week to forgive someone who has hurt me" or "I will spend some time reflecting on how much God has forgiven in my life". The third one may be a suggested verse for memorizing like "I will memorize Romans 12:1-2 this week". Sometimes the third one will be something we would like to know such as "I will attend the missional outreach seminar next week". There is extra blank space for writing in prayer requests.

One thing I didn't mention that was requested for was to print the 'next steps' in the bulletin. People said that they committed to do something but later couldn't remember what it was. Since it is in the bulletin they can take it home with them and remember.

Hope that helps.
jd

Allen Coker said:

This could really work for us too. I've almost quit offering much of an invitation because no one responds publicly. Just for clarification...are "the next steps" three actual points that tie into your message or are they just three blanks on the back of the card?

[James Nored]

John, good thoughts here. We do the response cards at the end of the sermon in much the same way. I found that when we did this, the number of people who started making commitments like wanting to have a Bible study, placing membership, being baptized, asking for prayers, etc. rose significantly.