Suburbia is centered around safety, security, and kids, among other things. People move to the suburbs so that their kids can have a better life, get away from the drugs and violence of the city.
Of course, this fails to recognize that there are all kinds of drugs in suburbs, because that is where the money is. And if violence is lower in the suburbs, materialism is rampant there and a far greater threat to the soul.
But the love of kids, while often genuine, many times gives way to living through one's kids. Because if my kids succeed, then this says something about me.
After all, why else are kids in competitive soccer at age 3 and are taking the Princeton SAT Prep at age 5? Why else are they involved in 4 extra-curricular activities and run from practice to practice? Is it because the kids want to do this? Hardly. It is because we are living vicariously through our kids.
A book which really impacted my wife and I is Death by Suburb by David L. Goetz. Goetz says this:
"An immortality symbol is not really about the thing. It's not about baseball. It's not really about my child. It's about the glory that the thing bestows on me. I will be famous, finally. I will have the masses bow down and then rise up and call me Lord. Why do I feel so blessed that my son has the best batting average on his Park District team for a handful of spring games? Is it simply because I'm proud of my son's accomplishments? Of course not.
Successful children are the ultimate glory in today's Park District and Travel Team culture. Children level the playing field. Whether from blue money or new money or no money, each child represents real potential for glory in the here and now. They are the ultimate extension of our selves. If glory means covering for your seventh-grader, then so be it."
Living through one's kids happens when people have no identity or purpose in Christ. So,
one of the gospel messages that we can share in suburbia is that people have meaning and value because of Christ's love for them and place in God's kingdom--regardless whether or not they have a job, have kids that make straight A's or make the cheerleading squad or football team, or are really popular.
This will also allow them to cancel one or one of their kid's ten activities which are running them ragged.
If we can get this message across to people, they will thank us for it. Connecting the gospel to suburbanites in this way is missional. Here is an
eight week study on Death by Suburb for small groups.
What areas of brokenness do you see in suburbia?
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